Man, this year is a major roller coaster ride. Although it may have been one heck of a year, it did bring me a few good things.
I wished for many things this time last year;
- Finally be able to start following my dreams-this was pretty vague, I was in a place where I didn’t know where to turn to. I just wanted some direction in my life, something to make me want to look forward to Mondays again.
- Travel-I wanted to do this for so long, yet I didn’t want to feel as if I was running away from all my problems.
- Go back home and recharge.
- Just be happy
These all somewhat came true. I finally got to continue what I want to do and I am back home. And I am in my dream university to boot, if that isn’t enough motivation for me to work my butt off then I dunno what is. Perhaps this is what I needed after all, but I also needed that time in England. I will always have two homes in my heart, and I will always come back to both.
The traveling part kinda worked-my first ever trip to Singapore happened this year. Definitively the first of many visits here in Asia. Though I do need to save up for more of that to happen.
The big question is, am I happy?
This year has been one heck of a clusterfuck. It was one where you just have to deal with everything as they happen. So to answer the question at hand, I suppose I am. I have a lot more to be thankful for than I first thought.
My family, albeit being as crazy as ever, is happy and healthy. I have met many amazing and talented people. Been to places I wanted to go to/visit again. I’ve been given another shot to do things.
Life may not always go my way, but it finds its way. It doesn’t follow a strict timeline anyway, you just need to be ready for speedbumps.
One of the things that I am thankful for this year is that it led me to where I needed to be. It took longer than I expected but it was definitely worth it.
After 6 years, I’m back in the Philippines during Christmas time. And boy, did I miss this.
It’s hard to feel the Christmas spirit abroad; Filipino christmas is something one should experience at least once in their life. There’s just something about being excited about the season once the -ber months start rolling in. Add to the fact that life away from home can feel lonely as well. I can’t explain it, though perhaps fellow lone wolves/wanderlust aficionados can explain it better.
Last year, I wished for some clarity in my life and to come home even just for a while. My life was in a standstill and perhaps it was partly my fault too. There’s so many things I wanted to do, places to visit and the works. I was nowhere near that and I just felt so lost-I was envious of the life other people were leading and I forgot to work on my own life for a while. Fast forward to June and suddenly, everything did a 180 turn. Guess life works in mysterious ways and I found myself in my dream school and spending the holidays just as it should be spent: being happy.
I am in no way entirely happy, there are days when everything seems to weigh you down, add that to the fact that I am in my dream university and our hell weeks last for a long time. But I am in a better place than I was last year, or the past couple of years for that matter.
Finally, some of the pieces are finally falling into place.
My wish after completing this year’s Misa de Gallo is still the same; make sense of everything, have some peace of mind, and be happier.
And to Him that is the reason for this season, thank you for believing in me, even when I don’t deserve it.Thank you for second, third and even fourth chances in life.
Happy Holidays everyone, may you receive more blessings and have amazing food during your Noche Buena.
Just one more thing before I can officially say goodbye to this semester. Glad to have survived this with very minimal amount of sleep.